If I Were A Rich Man

The teacher asked her students to write an essay, explaining what they would do if they each had a million dollars.

Every pupil except Teddy began writing immediately. He just sat in his chair, making faces and twiddling his thumbs.

At the end of the class period, the teacher collected the papers and Teddy turned his blank sheet in with the rest.

"What is the meaning of this, Teddy?" asked the teacher. "Is this  your essay? All the others have written two pages or more, while you have done absolutely nothing!"

Rise Again

Sometimes we pretend, but there are situation that it is needed, look at this story;

A young priest was supposed to preach in the prison. Day after day he tried to find some message or formula that would move hard hearts.

As he entered the room, he shuddered under the gaze and stares of the crime-hardened faces. He said a silent prayer for light as he walked up to the pulpit. He stumbled on the second last step and rolled over heels right down to the floor. The audience broke out into loud laughter.

Cleverness Catching Up

There had been a shortage of beef, and the butcher placed his last roast on the scale.

"That'll be $3.95," he told the waiting customer.

"That one's too small; don't you have anything larger?" the woman asked.

The willy butcher returned the roast to the refrigerator, paused a moment, then took it out again. "This one," he

Hard Times

A man we know had trouble settling an avalanche of bills. By dint of thrift and hard work, he managed not only to pay them off, but he even increased his regular business and wound up with an even greater showing than in the previous year.

One of his creditors, receiving a check in payment of his account through the mail, wrote and admiringly

Medical Work

One day a tourist was weaving through the back streets of Calcutta and looked in at a hallway clinic where a nun was down on her knees dressing the smelly sore of a leper. He could not look on, it turned his stomach. He walked away in disgust saying, "Sister, I would not do that for a million dollars."

Eye Contact

Eye contact helps people in almost any walk of life. Examples: Salvation Army "Santas" claim they almost always get a donation if they make eye contact with pedestrians. Salespeople who use eye contact with customers generate more and larger sales.

Hitchhikers stand a better chance of getting rides if they engage in eye contact with passing motorists.

Mothers

If there is something one cannot do without, it is mother. Father loves her, daughter imitates her, son ignores her, salesman thrive on her, motorists hurry around her, teachers phone her, and the woman next door confides in her.

She can be sweeter than sugar, more sour than a lemon, all smiles, and crying her heart out- all without any given two-minute period.

She likes sewing, detective stories, having her birthday remembered, church, a new dress, the cleaning woman, father's praise, a little lipstick, flower and plants, canasta, dinner out on Sunday, policeman, one whole day in bed, crossword puzzles, sunny days, tea, and the newspaper boy.

She dislikes doing dishes, father's boss, having her birthday forgotten, the motorist behind her, spring cleaning, Junior's report card, rainy days, neighbor's dog stairs, and the man who supposed to cut the grass.
She can be found standing by, bending over, reaching for, kneeling under, and stretching around, but rarely sitting on.

What Do You See?

An economist was asked to talk to a group of business people.
She tacked up a big sheet of white paper. Then she drew a black spot on the paper and asked a man in the front row what he saw.
The man answered promptly, "A black spot."
The speaker asked every person in the room the same question and each replied, "A black spot."

Standards

In a little village, a man always stopped by a clock shop window to set his watch every morning.

One day the clock shop owner stepped outside and asked this man, "Why do you stop here every morning and set your watch?"

The man replied, "I work at the big factory down the street, and I am in charge of blowing the noon whistle every day. I stop here every morning to make sure I have the exact time."

Man in the Hole

A man was walking along and fell into such a deep hole that he could not get out. So he began to shout very loudly for help.

A learned professor came along and found him. He looked down into the hole and lectured the unfortunate man: "Why were you so foolish as to fall down there in the first place? You should be more careful. If you ever get out again, watch your step."

And with that he took off.

Then a holy monk came along. He looked down into the hole and told the man, "I'll try to reach down as far as I can, and you reach up as far as you can. If I can grab your hand, I'll pull you out."

Living on Purpose

They said he had died!

One morning in 1888 Alfred Nobel, the inventor of dynamite, who had amassed a fortune manufacturing and selling weapons of destruction, awoke to read his own obituary in the newspaper.

Actually, it was his brother who had died, but a reporter mistakenly wrote Alfred's obituary.

For the first time Alfred Nobel saw himself as the world saw him: "the dynamite king" and nothing more.

Finding Your Real Self

What if you could be anything, or anybody? Who would you chose to be? Would you be strong business leader? A minister? A celebrated athlete?
A reporter asked George Bernard Shaw to play the "What if" game shortly before he died. "Mr Shaw," he asked, "you have visited with some of the most famous people in the world. You have known royalty, world-renowned authors, artists, teachers of the world. If you could live your life over and be anybody you've known,

Making People Pray

A bus driver and a priest died at the same time. Although the driver was sent directly to heaven, the priest's case was apparently harder to decide.

"I don't mind that you sent a bus driver to heaven," the priest was heard complaining. "But after all, I was a priest. So why should I be kept waiting?"

A Positive Attitude

A positive attitude is every bit as important to  success as talent. It's important, too, to remember that optimism - like actions - speaks louder than words. many enormously successful people have bent over backwards to appear prudent- belittling even themselves or their own achievements - without ever slowing down in their pursuit of excellence. Let me give you some examples.

The great inventor said: "The phonograph is not of any commercial value," and "the radio craze will die out in time." The speaker was Thomas Edison.